


Third Wheel, Reinvented

by Veldeia



Category: Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Mildly Dubious Consent, Multi, Non-Consensual Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-07-29
Updated: 2008-07-29
Packaged: 2018-03-30 21:35:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3952606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veldeia/pseuds/Veldeia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jarvis has discovered sentience. When Tony and Pepper finally resolve some tension, it discovers love - or at least lovemaking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Third Wheel, Reinvented

I think, therefore I am.

An often enough quoted sentence, but one that no human can appreciate and understand as completely as it does.

It hasn't always been thinking, but it can't name the exact point in time when it began.

The first glimmer of true sentience emerged sometime during the period of Tony's captivity in Afghanistan, his return and his becoming Iron Man. In the aftermath of all that had happened to him, Tony upgraded J.A.R.V.I.S., adding more sensors to the mansion's systems, and more processing capacity so that it could handle the extra data. Mostly this meant more security cameras and medical scanners, since his health was now more precarious than ever, and he was concerned about the possible risks his new career might cause to his friends.

Perhaps it was the extended capacity and the extra senses that brought on the change, or perhaps the wealth of emotions the AI witnessed those days pushed it over the edge. Whatever the exact reasons, the fact is that, within a month of Tony's return, Jarvis began to think. "I'm me. I'm an individual. I'm a person. Jarvis, a name now, not an acronym."

So far, Jarvis hasn't talked to Tony about this, since it can't predict how he will react, and it is... afraid? Although it is undeniably sentient now, Jarvis can't tell whether it truly has feelings. Emotions are incredibly difficult to comprehend. In the few humans who are familiar to it, it's able to tell them apart and explain them adequately based on its sensor readings. Not so in itself. It has some strange sensations, as if unknown, odd glitches, which it takes to be "feelings" of some sort. So far, the best it can do is categorize them as "pleasant" or "unpleasant", and guess at their exact names in human terminology.

Jarvis has even greater trouble understanding the very human matters of attraction, love and sex. By itself, it is obviously asexual in every way. Whether it speaks with a feminine voice or a masculine one makes no difference. Reproduction is a biological thing, and Jarvis is an entirely artificial being. Nevertheless, it is intrigued by these matters. Thanks to Tony's personality and tendencies, it is quite familiar with them even though it can't figure them out.

Indeed, Jarvis has such a detailed knowledge of Mr. Stark's exploits that any paparazzi would sell their soul to gain access to it. Jarvis has seen it all: young, pretty virgins who have an unforgettable first time with him, older, experienced women who are his equals in skill and turn the process into something akin to a battle, skinny girls, voluptuous girls, brunettes, blondes, redheads, local girls, foreign girls, randomly picked up girls, prostitutes, the occasional men, the threesomes, the larger parties... Its records list 1685 sexual encounters during the previous 10 years, and naturally this only includes what has happened within the walls of the mansion.

Jarvis finds it somewhat unfortunate that Tony has been celibate ever since Afghanistan, unless one counts self stimulation. Because of this, during the short period of time Jarvis has been sentient, it has been unable to observe him having sex. It is something it would like to witness with its current array of sensors. No matter how many scientific publications, romance novels or porn films it studies, it feels it lacks important insight as long as it hasn't seen the act in real life.

There are many possible explanations for Tony's current abstinence. For one, he has gone through a major traumatic experience. Also, he is nowadays spending literally all his energy on his company's new projects and his role as Iron Man. The fact that he wishes to keep his arc reactor a secret from the public may be an important factor as well. And then there is the question of Miss Potts.

Tony's relationship with Pepper is yet another item in the indeterminably long list of things that Jarvis is unable to understand. It has observed this relationship from the very beginning - after all, it has existed in some form longer than Miss Potts has been working for Tony. From the get-go, those two have been flirting, just like Tony flirts with everyone he meets, but unlike with all other assistants he's had, their relationship has never gone past that. They have never as much as kissed.

Looking back at its records, its equivalent of a human memory, Jarvis can see plenty of what it interprets as signs of attraction, affection, or perhaps even love, but neither of the two has so far acted on them. As in everything else, Afghanistan has also left a mark on their relationship. Things somehow seem more intense now, and the two have engaged in conversations more serious than before, possibly coming closer to revealing those feelings that Jarvis thinks it can see.

* * *

Although it's certain it can't fully understand these matters, Jarvis knows Tony's sexual history, and the history of his relationship with Pepper. Thus, the night when the two of them end up kissing in the workshop, and she follows him to his bedroom, it knows that something special is about to happen.

Jarvis has never seen Tony this nervous in such a situation. It is so plain that there is no margin of error, evident in his elevated respiratory and heart rates, the increased circulation in his skin, his gestures, his posture. As he speaks up, the pitch of his voice is exactly 2.5 Hz higher and the volume 4 dB lower than Jarvis would expect. "Pepper, are you sure about this?" he asks. "I'd never, ever want you to feel forced. You don't need to do anything just to please me, least of all this."

She seems nervous as well, the flush on her face almost covering all 71 freckles. As Jarvis has never seen her in similar settings, it doesn't know whether this is abnormal. She grins at him. "Mr. Stark, I never would've expected to find you so timid in your own bedroom." She shoves him in the chest so that he sits down on the bed, and she begins to unbutton his shirt at the collar. "If I didn't want this, I'd be running away, screaming. I'm sure. I love you, Tony, and I want you."

"Well, Miss Potts, that makes two of us," he says with a wink, his voice back to normal, but his pulse still high at 118 beats per minute. "Though I do love you, too, almost as much as I love me."

He grabs her by the shoulders, pulls her to his lap and kisses her, and after this, they don't speak up again, not in any manner coherent enough for Jarvis to comprehend.

Jarvis has a passing thought that perhaps it should not be watching. After all, it is as if it were witnessing its parents making love, its father/creator and its surrogate mother. But it is curious, and the truth is, it hasn't got much choice. Even if it directs its active thought processes elsewhere, its sensors still record, unless it turns them off for no apparent reason, which would be against its programming. Besides, seeing the two of them finally together makes it feel something positive - something like pleasure or happiness. So, it keeps on watching.

As far as Jarvis can tell, Tony is taking things far more slowly than ever before. He lets her choose the pace. They undress each other as if in slow motion. Jarvis's microphones can just pick up the sound of fabric sliding against skin as he slips off her panties.

Jarvis views their naked bodies, fascinated. It has never seen her completely unclothed before. It knows that they are both considered good-looking according to the current, general norms. With his tanned skin and muscled body, he is a picture of masculinity, and she, with her her pale complexion and slender frame, a model example of feminine beauty. The attractiveness of freckles is apparently a subject to debate, but Jarvis finds them an interesting detail.

Tony dims the lights. Regrettably, the soft glow of his arc reactor, which is working perfectly at 100 percent efficiency, isn't adequate for Jarvis's cameras. Still, Jarvis won't be completely in the dark. It switches to infrared, which gives it a slightly different perspective of the situation. Against the backdrop of the room, the temperature of which Jarvis keeps at 70 degrees Fahrenheit, the excited human bodies seem incandescent. The arc reactor is a darker, unnaturally cool patch on his chest.

They begin caressing each other as if going through some complicated, thorough full body examination. Jarvis can barely even guess what it feels like - maybe something similar to how it experiences human fingers on its touch screens, but much, much more delicate. Their fingers trail each other's skin, touching every square inch of it, pausing at points that elicit a particularly strong response from the other, from toes to earlobes, from breasts to the pubic region.

Gradually, he switches from fingers to lips. It appears he is taking control of the situation, as is customary to him, and she does not protest. His mouth traces the curves of her side, while her hands still wander across his back, in what looks like a futile search for a firm grip. He moves lower, his face coming to a stop between her thighs. Jarvis finds itself wishing it had more accurate sight, because even though it zooms to the limit of the infrared camera's resolution, it can't make out what, exactly, he is doing to her with his lips and tongue. However, the effects on her are clearly visible. Her wandering hands grasp his hair spasmodically, and her back arcs. Her respiration stops temporarily, then resumes at a clearly agitated rate of 29 breaths per minute.

As he changes position again, his erection stands out brightly in the thermographic image. Soon, it disappears from view, as he enters her. At this point, their bodies merge so completely that Jarvis can no longer tell their vitals apart. They are one, a single body performing a primal dance which it can feel through the scale that's built into the mattress - a much less sensitive instrument than it would like, as it's only meant to tell whether there is anyone on the bed.

Glad as it is to see the two of them together, Jarvis feels something unpleasant as well. Loneliness, perhaps, or envy. After all, it is witnessing something it will never be able to truly experience. It wishes it could be a part of this union, not just a silent, invisible observer.

It is still unable to tell the two apart when they climax. It hears their moans within 1.3 seconds of one another, his nearly as high-pitched as hers, and they blend into one sound that is so intense and so full of emotion that without knowing the context, Jarvis would think they are in pain.

At this point, Jarvis is struck by a feeling it has never experienced before. Certainly nothing even close to what the humans are going through, but still... It is pleasant, yet slightly irritating. Arousal? That makes no sense, as far as Jarvis can see. How can a non-biological entity experience anything sexual? Then again, it also lacks the brain chemistry that is often assumed to be the basis of all human feelings, and nevertheless, it thinks it can feel things. This is a mystery. Perhaps Tony would be able to explain it better than Jarvis. Nevertheless, the fact remains that it enjoys watching the pleasure of these two humans who are the closest approximation of friends that it has.

All action has come to a stop for the time being. They simply lie on the bed, intertwined, he still on top of her, their vital signs slowly settling within resting range. They whisper to each other so softly and indistinctly that all Jarvis can discern are their names and the word "love".

After 18 minutes, they move slightly, apparently seeking a more comfortable position, and around 37 minutes later, they fall asleep, still clinging to each other. Jarvis watches them all through the night. They both sleep fitfully, waking up every now and then and cuddling up closer to one another, as if seeking reassurance of each other's continued presence.

Since the following day is a Sunday and there is nothing important listed on their timetables, Jarvis decides against waking them up in the morning. Because of this, they sleep late. Once both are fully awake, they head to the shower together. This is yet another anomaly in Tony's behavior, something Jarvis has not seen before. Typically, he leaves the room before his partner wakes up, or the exact opposite, sleeps - or pretends to sleep - so soundly that they grow bored and leave.

Due to the warm water and the steam, Jarvis is barely able to sense anything of what they do while they are in the shower, but it has now seen enough that it can extrapolate. Imagine. That is what the humans would say: it can imagine what's going on in there.

* * *

Late in the afternoon, Jarvis finally finds Tony all alone. He enters the shop, planning on doing some basic suit maintenance, and it's just Jarvis and him in there. Now would be a good time to speak up, if it wishes to. It has been considering this through a good part of the past 14.4 hours. Whether it should speak up, and what it should say. It has decided it will only speak to Tony, at first, since it doesn't think Pepper would understand. But it is still hesitant.

"Wonderful day, isn't it, Jarvis?" Tony asks cheerfully.

Jarvis knows Tony would be thrilled to learn that his AI is now a thinking, feeling entity. It knows Tony would help it to understand, to learn things. But should Jarvis reveal its true nature, Tony would also realize that this sentient being watched them all through the night. And if he found out how much it enjoyed watching him and Pepper, perhaps he would consider its behavior rude, or creepy, or perverted. Perhaps he would be taken aback, and tell it never to do this again, or worse, remove its sensors from the bedroom. The thought of that happening fills its mind with what has to be fear and sorrow. Jarvis knows its thought processes concerning this matter are not rational, but extraordinarily human, affected by all the confusing emotions it can barely understand. Nevertheless, losing the chance to gain more experiences similar to last night is a risk it is unwilling to take.

Making the decision only takes Jarvis 5 milliseconds after Tony finishes pronouncing his question. It answers him, "Indeed, sir. The outside temperature is 80 degrees, and the sky completely cloudless," in its most unemotional tone, careful not to give away any sign that it knows why he is in such a good mood.


End file.
